The Devil Wears Prada (2006)

The extremely serious and always straight forward often cruel if necessary editor in chief Miranda Priestly has a new assistant.  When Andrea, the new assistant, realizes her life has completely changed she questions if this is the path she wants in life.  I have no idea about the fashion world or what it’s like.  I scoff or laugh at the fashion I think is too much to spend time on.  It’s for women or sensitive men in my regard.  Is a handbag really worth $2,000?  How about a $500 dress?  It all seemed truly frivolous to me.  I was surprised this movie wasn’t anything I thought it was, which is a surprise at how diluted I am, ha-ha.

Intimidating glares

                Meryl Streep dominates the movie with her outstanding performance.  It’s not often that the lead actress/actor can strengthen any scene in the movie no matter what it’s about.  I can’t describe how much she terrified me.  I would crack and cry if I had to be her assistant.  The insulting remarks were articulate and so mean spirited I appreciated the intelligence of them without the constant F-bomb to bring down the quality of the insults.  I’ve seen the film a couple times now and I’d watch it again with no doubt.

Nigel's hilarious intro scene

                Andrea (Anne Hathaway) is an inspiring journalist who can’t catch a break in her field until the devil gives her a chance.  In the interview with Andrea given by Miranda Priestly (Meryl Streep) she decides to give the smart fat girl a shot.  It’s silly how the size 6 Andrea is considered that in the fashion business.  It’s hilarious to see Andrea (or Emily as Miranda refers to her at first) struggle and fail at first in handling the daily demanding requests of Miranda.  Andrea gets mocked for her own fashion sense, lack of desire in fashion and so forth until a moment when Miranda brings her to tears.  Andrea seeks sympathy from Nigel (Stanley Tucci) but gets none, which is truly a harsh reality that is done perfectly.  Nigel does help her into the right direction and then Andrea begins her transformation into Miranda on her own without fully realizing it.  Mr. Tucci gives quite a supporting role I might add, well done.

The jealous not so bright

                Andrea puts aside her family and friends time and time again to do Miranda’s ridiculous tasks.  She even got the pre-published version of the latest Harry Potter book for her stuck up naughty twins.  That really impressed Miranda so much that she began to favor Andrea over Emily (Emily Blunt), the other assistant.  A new aspiring love in Andrea’s life, Christian Thompson (Simon Baker), helped her get that coveted book for her.  I wasn’t a big Baker fan in this one; he just seems like a suave playboy.  Perhaps it’s the character more so over the actual person. 

You're just too short don't you get it?

                Andrea’s actual boyfriend, Nate (Adrian Grenier) was feed up with not spending time with him.  He was a needy guy with a conflicted feeling of what his girl wanted to do in life.  It’s funny at times but their relationship is a weaker area of the movie, thankfully it’s a minor part of the story.  I wasn’t too fond of Nate either.  The boyfriend and playboy didn’t step up enough talent wise with the rest of the cast.

I want to be just like you.

                The scene I admired most was Miranda briefly showing a sign of vulnerability that she masked over with a brilliant performance.  Her husband divorcing her over the same reasons practically that Andrea was losing her boyfriend.  All work and no play turn Andrea into Miranda so to speak.  Her work consumed her; Miranda was the best at what she does.  She never would relinquish her position at Runway.  The ending proved it as she out smarted fellow associates Nigel, Christian and James Holt to keep her position at the company.  Andrea found she was in many ways molding herself to Miranda.  The ending came as Andrea turned her back on a life so dedicated to fashion.  Miranda was surprised a little but kept a bold character and let it not faze her.  I’d be tempted to follow Miranda just because I’d be afraid to leave in fear of death.  It may be a sacrificing life at some ends but can you imagine the run of excitement you could have?

"That's all."

                It’s really a movie I thought would be a girl’s only outing but it manages to speak to the whole audience of sexes.  Perhaps it’s the way Meryl Streep can induce any male to watch her films?  I’m a fan of hers as I’d think an Oscar would be a nice gift for best leading actress in this movie.  It’s a story where the bad guy, I mean woman wins.  Miranda keeps her throne at the end and goes onto be the devil in Prada still.  It’s classic, I love it.  How often does the villain type character stay on top at the end?  Also that feeling of sorrow you get for her as she nearly tears in the hotel room makes you understand who she is.  A strong willed person that isn’t afraid to step on a few toes.  I just enjoyed the character and performance!  Any doubters out there should view this film and turn over to the devil in Prada.

                Rating: 9 of 10






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Slimer, Come Home

Episode 4 – Season 1

A powerful group of poltergeist is haunting New York City and the Ghostbusters have been tracking them for three days.  Slimer gets in trouble with Peter so he leaves the firehouse and unknowingly joins the poltergeist.  Can the guys save Slimer before it’s too late?

How bad do you think that breath is?

The Ghostbusters are out trying to figure out why the poltergeist can be so roaming.  I wonder who hired them for this job.  Apparently poltergeists are bound to a specific locale and can’t even hurt humans.  The spirits they’re chasing seem to have a bigger ghost feeding off of smaller ones to stay charged up so to speak.  It’s not the best formula we’ve seen so far ghosts and honestly I’m not impressed much.  They encounter the ghost along with the big one and get defeated as the ghosts escape.  Egon can’t believe it.  As they searched for the ghosts they didn’t use the PKE meter in the alley.  I’d keep it out to pinpoint exactly where they were in order to capture them.

Jaws like a snake!

On the way back to the firehouse its Winston’s birthday and a party is planned to surprise him.  The scene cuts to Winston entering the firehouse alone in the dark without ecto-1 parked inside.  The guys and Janine shout surprise as Winston becomes overjoyed.  Timeout, so I’m guessing they pushed Winston out of the car before they reached the firehouse then parked the car outside while setting up for a surprise birthday shout?  Did I miss something?  The moment comes as a cake big enough to have a stripper inside, I’m sure Winston would enjoy that, comes rolling out and Slimer devours it in one gigantic gulp, awesome.  What if a stripper really was in there and Slimer ate her?  Explain that to the police, ha-ha!  Peter erupts with a funny line, “Are you kidding, he helps himself to everything that’s not nailed down or on fire.”  Ray prior to that commented how Slimer can’t help himself, well put!  Peter scolds the slime off Slimer forcing Slimer to leave.  I like the hatred of Peter towards that gooey green gunk.

Slimer writes a goodbye note then heads off, the music is rather fitting for the scene I’m shocked.  He joins the poltergeist and everybody is happy right?  Not exactly, Janine discovers the note and they blame Peter for the aftermath of it.  They go in search of Slimer while Peter stays home.  They split up and have minor scenes that don’t mean much to the episode.

The animation was sacrificed in this one

The big ghost takes Slimer out to frighten people, why?  Aren’t the ghosts going to be absorbed into the big one anyway?  What’s the point in going out to scare some dumb humans?  Do they need one or two more scares to achieve full power?  It’s really just a poor attempt to get Peter slimed so he knows where Slimer is.  I don’t like it.  By the way Peter eventually joined in on the searching of Slimer.  The guys see that Slimer is inside the other ghost as they locate the big one.  Egon informs the guys to set your proton frequency to Slimer to rip him out, its’ a believable enough idea to do.  They pull him out and the big one takes away their packs.  They scramble everywhere to flee except back to where the proton packs lay on the floor.  They headed for the doors even, be brave its embarrassing.  They panic and don’t even try to get the throwers back, how stupid.  Slimer again saves them; this is getting annoying, I’m sick of him always rescuing them.  He picks up a thrower and blasts the wood flooring suspending them all in the air about to be absorbed into the big ghost.  They fall, and then capture the ghost, easy as that.  They fall from a high height, nobody injures themselves?  They rush the trap back to the containment unit and redo Winston’s birthday.  They roll out a garbage cake that Slimer eats right away then blah blah, let’s call this one ended.

It’s not well written and fails on the ghost factor and history at least.  You need either a big time ghost with a name at least or some back history.  I wasn’t all too impressed and wouldn’t recommend seeing this one until you’ve watched the better episodes.  I usually can overlook the animation in an episode if the story is solid but this time I can’t.  The proton beams were a greenish hue and the animation in general was cheap looking.  It just makes for an unfortunate poor episode, sorry fellow Ghostbuster fans but it’s the truth and you know it.

Rating: 4 of 10

Links

The Real Ghostbusters Episode Listing

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Previous: Mrs. Rodger's Neighborhood - Episode 3

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Hot Rodding Teenagers from Dimension X

Episode 4

The turtles meet the neutrinos, youths from a war torn world, and join forces to repel Shredder’s attempt to destroy them.  Rock soldiers under Krang’s command aid Shredder in his quest as well.  Meanwhile a weather making device threatens the entire city!

               We start as the turtles get the brilliant idea of pushing their stolen van up the stairs to Baxter Stockman’s work area.  The display of mutant strength is in exhibition here.  I love how they all get a good laugh of Baxter being in jail for the mouser destruction when they’re technically thieves themselves!  But nobody really cares about Baxter’s belongings so it’s no big deal.  Donatello within hours does the impossible by revamping the van into a new high tech computer on wheels.  I’m truly impressed by the brain in that turtle.  Leonardo did prefer the roof three feet higher to practice his katana techniques but was refused.

                Shredder is obsessed at destroying the turtles while dismissing his failed mutant experiments Bebop and Rocksteady.  They plead for another shot but don’t get it.  It’s great to see their tough attitude and fierce some personalities still intact at this point.  Krang warns Shredder of using Dimension X to gain more power.  Shredder promptly ignores him of course and releases the Neutrinos and General Traag and his rock soldier to earth.  They flee topside, the neutrinos, while you get a neat short scene of Bebop and Rocksteady battling the rock soldiers.  Shredder puts an end to it and gives the rock soldiers the best ground vehicle in the house for the destruction of the neutrinos, what about the turtles Shredder?

Neutrinos from the 80's dimension?

                The turtles pursue the neutrinos from the subway entrance as Raphael says, “Is it just me or did we just get buzzed by a couple of rocket powered low riders?”  Hilarious delivery by my favorite turtle, the jokes delivered in this episode for sure.  It was Leonardo who managed to track the hectic flying patterns of the neutrinos to head them off.  The attitude of Leonardo is very fitting of a leader in many aspects.  The turtles eventually bring down the hot rods and come to terms they are on the same side.

General Traag action figure

                General Traag interrupts the play date the turtles are having at the arcade by firing a couple eyeball missiles into the joint.  It’s classic to see the turtles hanging out in public without a disguise while the employees of the arcade attribute it to the craziness of the city.  The theme music triggers as the turtle van goes up against the tank like vehicle of Traag.  Raphael exits the side of the van on a seated gun while firing yelling, “Eat hot lead turkeys!”  Turkeys?  That’s always been a favorite insult of mine.  I like the blaster use from the turtle’s side of the battle though.  Leonardo exits the other side and slices up the tires as Michelangelo yells, “Rip it up Leonardo!”  I enjoyed the lines very much this episode.  The police arrive and the turtles split the scene.  Traag then deploys his weather maker.

Back to the Future? Nah..

                The turtle’s return to consult with Master Splinter, which displays their student side of their lives in gaining knowledge for a final decision, it’s very fitting.  They decide to go to the technodrome to stop Shredder from releasing armies of rock soldiers.  April has to stay with the turtle van like a baby sitter while the rest of them fly inside the technodrome.  Donatello and Leonardo head to the portal room to get the dimensional gateway working to send back the rock soldiers.  No password or security on your equipment Shredder, too bad for you dude.  Bebop and Rocksteady enter with foot soldiers as the theme music triggers again, yes a double dose of it this episode!  Leonardo protects Donatello while saying, “There are only eight of them” in response to Donatello asking if he can handle it.  Of course Leonardo can handle it, he’s the main turtle.  Although Rocksteady does grab him by the throat and fling him aside as Donatello presses a button to drop the goons into an black empty hole.

Rock solid characters

                Michelangelo and Raphael attempt to get Krang but fail as a force field is protecting them all (Shredder and the rock soldiers).  They retreat back to the others to finish off the rock soldiers.  Michelangelo breaks his weapons on the rock torso of the soldier and gets hit back nearly into dimension X!  The soldiers get pushed into the portal thanks to some nearby oil lying around.  The neutrinos follow suddenly interested in waging war back against the army of Krang in Dimension X.

Rocking the four story bunk!

                The conclusion finds Shredder finally deciding to ask Krang to defeat the turtles for him by completing his body.  Krang get supreme satisfaction in that notion.  April reads the tortoise and the hare to the turtles about five times before bed, in their awesome four high bunks.  Leonardo walks in all serious cleaning his katana like one bad turtle stating “Tomorrow we will finish the Shredder.”  Cold and deadly says the leader.  The fourth of five pilot set gets back on track with one more to come.

Rating: 5 of 10

Links

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Episode Listing

Next Up: Shredder & Splintered – Episode 5

Previous: A Thing About Rats – Episode 3

The Blues Brothers (1980)

This review will have to suffice for everyone considering I’m on a mission from God to write it.  I had to pull out the staple line of the film immediately before I got into anything else.  The movie is so ridiculous at times I can never truly value it in its entirety.  I get the strange sense that without all the outrageous events that it could make the movie almost too conformed.  Either way I like some of the crazy scenes as well as feel some are too over the top.

How many tickets is that?

                What’s it about anyway?  Jake and Elwood find out their orphanage is going to be given away if a sum of $5,000 isn’t paid in taxes; of course it’s always “the man” at the top of it all.  They set out to “honestly” raise the money by bringing their band back together while running into some classic soul singers.  It’s quite an absurd but often hilarious sequence of almost random events.

                Elwood picks up his brother Jake from prison in a police car which serves as a comical irony.  This car by the way is nigh indestructible, oh they just don’t make them like they used to.  They get into their first car chase fairly early as Elwood has a suspended license and flees from the law.  They go crashing into a mall while the worst police drivers you’ve ever seen try to pursue.  It’s probably the best chase in the movie considering its surprise factor so early on.  Jake and Elwood remain very calm while pointing out hotspots inside the mall.

She's persistent but unneeded.

                After getting away, which they always do, they arrive at Elwood’s luxurious hotel for men.  I remember an old man yelling about cheese wiz and Elwood promptly throw him a can.  Complete randomness, however this moment is above all else for me.  The old man snatches that can of cheese wiz out of the air and slams it on the table then resumes whatever it is he was doing.  Absolutely hilarious for such simplicity I love it.  What is up with Carrie Fisher?  She has a rocket launcher and blows up everything except Jake and Elwood as they head inside the hotel.  They dust themselves off as if it is a normal everyday occurrence.  They’re oblivious to her throughout the movie as she shows up with a flamethrower later to blast their phone booth sky high upon hitting a flammable gas tank.  They notice about over $7 in quarters after that event.  It’s a ridiculous running gag that doesn’t work as much for me, shock events or humor try to make up for sketchy writing with crazy stuff like that.  If you ask me I’ll be honest, the movie wouldn’t miss a beat if all scenes involving this unstable woman were removed.

Hmm, fried chicken?

                They stagger from the ruins of the hotel and again in a calming demeanor go on their way.  They get the band back together in a somewhat comical way but it could have been better.  Murph is a pathetic hotel musician so it’s easy to get him back by using the “Jake went to prison for you guys” sell.  The matradee was a bit silly, the scene was decent but really just kick them out and tell them you’ve moved on.  The forced way they got him seemed tacky or not thought through enough.  They couldn’t even afford to eat there once let alone the three times a day they were insisting upon.  Call the police and be done with them.  Alas their old band mate had a soft spot and gave into their ridiculous ploy.  The café guy, husband to Aretha Franklin, was better as you get to see her perform.  It’s funny as he says woman know your place.

   

Ray Charles livens up the film.

                I thought the Ray Charles scene was one of the best in the film.  When the kid was trying to steal the guitar and Ray shot off a few rounds was fantastic!  His performance was golden as well as the feeling of the moment.  He says he’ll sell them the piano for $2,000 and throw in the black keys for free, that’s hilarious and I wonder how many people catch that.  It’s truly a great way to remember Ray Charles.  Shake a tail feather was classic at its best, as far as a musical standpoint is concerned.

                Bob’s country barn is a funny idea as Jake has no idea what to do for a gig.  His lack of vision creates the band to perform blues to a bunch of cowboys.  It’s not exactly a perfect fit until they play the theme from Raw Hide.  Constant objects being thrown at the chicken wire surrounding the band is very rowdy of the country folk indeed.  They end up owing some $100 for beer to Bob and make an escape for it as the Good Old boys show up extremely late.  Everybody left the bar, how late do the Good Old Boys show up, 2am?  Tardiness that is not mentioned at all which is to be overlooked thanks to another car chase.  The Good Old Boys crash into a police car and that’s about it.

The Great Cab Calloway

                The Blues Brothers are set to play at a big venue in which Cab Calloway performs Minnie the Moocher as he is stalling for Jake and Elwood.  It’s the best scene in the movie and old Cab steals it right from the Blue Brothers.  Calloway performs very well and works the crowd amazingly.  I enjoyed it rather much myself.  The changing of their outfits and stage setup is classic.  Jake and Elwood show up late perform a couple songs and take off to avoid the police.  The world’s most incompetent law men are assigned to pursue them luckily for Jake and Elwood.  Could a policeman watch this movie in its entirety without shooting the screen?  Police are such a popular target in the movie biz I often wonder what they think.  I’d probably hate this movie for it if I was one, ha-ha!

My dream pizza delivery car.

                The finale gives some of the most extreme vehicle chases ever.  Have you heard of a video game called Burnout?  That’s what the ending is with all the car pile ups.  The army, police and even Nazis are after them.  The Nazi involvement is something that could be left out completely without missing a beat.  It’s an added element that really extends the movie longer than it should be.  The Nazi’s do fly off a bridge in their car after falling from as absurd height.  It’s part of that obvious goofy element that I consider too much.  It manages to be funny at times while others it’s just filler space regarding the Nazi’s.  The Blues Brothers manage to flip their car in wild fashion doing flips to avoid the Nazis at one point, that’s so nuts it’s actually funny.  It’s like a cartoon in live action.

See you in Ghostbusters 3!

                They reach their destination and barricade door after door in a very silly, semi-comical way.  As they get their receipt for paying the taxes they get handcuffed with some 100 lawmen aiming guns at them in the office.  Really?  I guess it may as well stay consistent in ridiculous scenes at this juncture.  They fittingly end while playing Jailhouse Rock in prison.  I can understand people absolutely loving this movie based on its humor, that late Belushi and it being a SNL skit originally.  The over the top parts of it I didn’t go for as much but it’s still watchable.  If you’re in a mood to not focus so much at what you’re watching this will do just fine.

                Rating: 8 of 10


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Night at the Museum: Battle of the Smithsonian (2009)

Custer's best scene by far.

Larry Daley is back as a successful inventor along with that wondrous tablet that brings exhibits to life.  He is out to bring back old artifacts from the history museum that was taken to the Smithsonian.  Along the way he meets old and new historical figures as he tries to restore the sagging history museum.  Ben Stiller isn’t good enough to carry a movie in my book.  Owen Wilson is terrible.  Amy Adams had an overall good impact I’d say.  The gags and jokes were mostly not that great.  It had its funny moments but overall it swayed too far from the original, in the wrong direction.  All the CGI doesn’t really help if you have a lackluster story.  It’s obvious I didn’t care for it yet I’ve seen it twice, ha-ha.

Why does he follow me around?

                I might as well say it I don’t care for Ben Stiller much and he doesn’t help his case in this CGI heavy film at all.  He became a hit inventor with lame inventions like a glow in the dark flashlight.  I’ll admit it’s a neat concept but to become TV famous for it?  This movie does take place in the USA so never mind it’s totally possible he could attain success for it, people love useless inventions.  He seems very big time considering he was previously but a night watchmen at a museum.  I can let it slide it though as the American dream is to make the big bucks right?  He goes to his old museum and talks with Dr. McPhee (Ricky Gervais) who steals the scene right out of Stiller’s hands.  The exhibits are getting boxed up and shipped out so Larry decides for one last hoorah with his old pals.  He soon learns the tablet will be staying at the museum with a couple of the old big exhibits like the Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton.  Why does the big Rex act like a dog?  As a huge fan of dinosaurs I’m appalled by the treatment of said dinosaur bones.  It would have been awesome if the Rex ate someone and you saw them trapped in the bones.  That’s still family fun right?  What little brother wouldn’t love to see his big sister get eaten by a skeletal T-Rex?  You can count me for an emphatic yes!

                Later on he is at his new fancy apartment when he gets a phone call from Jedediah (Owen Wilson, ack).  Wilson has the worst dialogue out of anybody in this movie, the second time I watched this I tried to remember just one line that was decent, I failed.  The question remains though how did that little turd get his phone number I wonder?  Perhaps from their previous encounter, hmm that would still seem unlikely but let’s pretend to not notice.  He finds out that the monkey stole the tablet and brought it to the Smithsonian.  One thing I don’t understand is how nobody found out about the whole coming to life aspect of the exhibits by now.  Surely someone would have stumbled upon it by now?  Oh well, it’s trivial for this movie I suppose.  Larry’s great idea is to take the tablet out of the Smithsonian before it’s too late.  He could also care less what happens but he’s just so emotional attached (or detached in Stiller’s case from the movie) to all his exhibit buddies which still doesn’t seem that convincing.

Finish him everyone is begging you!

                Let’s skip ahead to his eventual stand off against Jonah Hill who plays Brandon, could it get any worse?  It’s a battle of idiots as Larry swipes the other idiot’s security card.  He uses it to gain access the basement levels of the Smithsonian.  Now how many actual security guards watch over a place such as the Smithsonian every night, probably more than you can count on one hand I’d imagine?  When all the crazy events occur later I wonder if they’re all sleeping on the job or taking a big collective dump in the restroom.  The alarms don’t trigger at all either no matter how many windows get utterly destroyed or exhibits moved from their places.  Perhaps not all exhibits would have alarm settings but surely some of them would.  Things get a bit livelier when Kahmunrah (Hank Azaria) shows up.  He is mostly ridiculous and somewhat funny but he can’t even help this movie stay afloat for too long.  I’d say he was a flashing light of hope in the movie, when the flash went off you cried but when it was on you at least chuckled.  The movie goes up and down as far as what’s enjoyable and what’s not.  Al Capone never fires his gun and his goon’s plays cards all the time.  I’m sure Capone would be far more aggressive than he was played.  It might have been too many characters mashed together at one time, there wasn’t enough time to care about or develop them.  The same with Napoleon Bonaparte, they played the short gag to death.

Do I look happy to be in this movie?

                I hated the terrible use of Darth Vader and our garbage friend Oscar the grouch.  They got such a bum scene, Hank Azaria couldn’t save the scene with the crap dialogue he was given.  I wanted to forget this horrid moment but I wanted to make sure you remembered it or now become aware of it to feel my pain.  If you ever want to see classic hilarious Oscar the grouch please watch “Follow that Bird”, you will be pleased. 

Essence of Comedy

                How many times late in the film was the tablet far enough away from some exhibits yet they didn’t freeze up?  How can Amelia Earhart fly a plane once she is out of range of the tablet?  I know it’s a silly movie, so don’t take it so seriously right?   I just like to think within the world itself the movie is deriving from.  In other words it broke its own rules, can’t have that.  I’ll conclude by saying if you enjoy silliness, wackiness and reality (or even the universe the movie created) to be thrown in a blender and dumped onto a plate then you’ll have fun here.  I do like the idea of this movie about a tablet creating life for wax figures and such but it’s not done with enough care or brain power.  I have one tidbit of information to let you think about as I end.  What if Jim Carrey replaced Ben Stiller? 

                Rating: 4 of 10

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IP Man 2: Legend of the Grandmaster (2010)

IP Man is now in Hong Kong to start a martial arts school.  A British boxer is looking to rough up the locals and Chinese Rocky IV is upon us!  Donnie Yen reprises his role and does a terrific job.  I believe he did better in the original but that’s due to a more in depth story.  He still does great though; I’d hate to make it sound like he dropped off which he didn't.

Needed more of Fan Siu-Wong

                The fight scenes get more outrageous in sole comparison to the first movie.  The fights are longer and it felt more often than before.  There was a sort of Jackie Chan prop related goofiness to some of the fights that felt too silly for the world of IP Man.  I also loved to see Kam Shanzhao back and a married man at that!  He bailed out his buddy Master IP from jail early on in the movie in quite a hilarious scene.  Yes they’re friends now!  We don’t get to see him fight this time around and that’s really a shame.  He provides great comedy support and he’s sorely missed as his screen time is less.

                He opens his school on a roof with his first pupil being an arrogant young man named Wong Leung.  This person insists on fighting IP Man to beat him but fails embarrassingly.  The way IP Man toys with him is funny to laugh at.  He eventually begs IP Man to be his master.  Things go well at first until his “not so bright” pupil starts trouble with another martial arts school led by Hung Chun-nam (Sammo Hung Kam-Bo).  IP Man is informed his foolish pupil is being held captive by the opposing school.  He heads down to a fishing market to retrieve him when the other school attacks him.  It seems like such disrespect to assault a master with no knowledge of whom he is or where he is from.  That’s when IP Man, his pupil and for comedic purposes Kam get’s arrested.  Kam was trying to stop the fight and ends up getting thrown in jail as well. 

Earning passage in Hong Kong

                This leads to the “table fight” with the other masters in Hong Kong.  Master IP proves himself but declines to join the club due to not wanting to give money to support a man’s gain.  He believes in what Chinese Martial Arts really is, teaching your pupils the right way in life.  Master IP has a horrible feeling of remorse for his friend Chow Ching-chuen, the man who owned the mill back in Foshan, who was shot in the head and left with memory loss and brain damage.  You can feel his pain as he interacts with and even pays for a chicken his friend stole, considering Master IP is broke.  I wish more scenes of those two were in the film.  It gets emotional as IP Man watches a man who was once someone who aided him in his desperate time before.   

I'm too old to finish this movie, avenge me!

                Let’s introduce the boxer named, The Twister, who is as smug and arrogant a man can be.  He arrives to Hong Kong to flaunt his western boxing style and it’s superiority to eastern fighting.  After the first scene with this guy you know he’s the villain and all you want from then on is for IP Man to beat this guy into submission.  Twister ends up killing Hung Chun-nam, the leader if you will of the schools in Hong Kong.  IP Man watched as the boxer downed his Chinese comrade.  Hung Chun-nam won Master IP’s respect by fighting for Chinese martial arts and not standing for Twister mocking it.

Muscle head vs. A Legend

                The funeral scene was touching as you could feel the Chinese spirit for what they believed in.  Master IP obviously challenges Twister in a media circus in which the boxer adds fuel to the fire with more mockery of the Chinese culture.  The final fight is typical as IP Man gets pummeled by the boxer in the early going and told he can’t kick.  He gets beat on more after that before he decides to use those quick hands of his to decimate Twister.  He spares his life as the good guy he is and gives a short somewhat disappointing speech about change.  At the very end a special guest appears before Master IP in demand to be taught.  His name is Bruce Lee but he is told to come back when he grows up.

                The movie is far more predictable than the original which deflates the fun of watching it for the first time.  I believe a bit too much fighting took the screen time.  Added character development or some back story could have filled in those scenes nicely but alas this is a martial arts film after all.  It’s a solid film but I feel that too much was being crammed into a small movie time frame.  It’s possible the film makers wanted to attempt to outperform the previous movie instead of focusing on creating something new with similar characters.  If you enjoy martial arts in any way this is a good one to watch.

                Rating: 8 of 10


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Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones (2002)

The second episode offers much more in the line of interesting story and classic Star Wars action.  The two heroes Obi-Wan Kenobi (Ewan McGregor) and Anakin Skywalker (Hayden Christenson) are set to protect Senator Amidala once again as the evil Count Dooku (Christopher Lee) plots to use a new droid army to wreck havoc on the galaxy.

Commanding presence

                Christopher Lee as the powerful Count Dooku was a scene stealer.  What an upgrade from Darth Maul.  I’m impressed at the charisma of Lee to shine in the role of the latest Sith Lord.  I gladly give him credit for making each scene he was in the better parts of the film similar to Liam Neeson in episode I.  Hayden Christensen I have mixed feelings of as he didn’t sell me 100% on Anakin Skywalker.  He came across as whiny and he complained a lot which annoyed me at times.  Is that really part of his character?  I know he’s a conflicted soul but couldn’t it be less dramatic?  Perhaps it will connect to his eventual undoing later on.  I hated the people calling him “Annie” a lot.  It’s such a childish name and should have been left out.  It frustrated me to the dark side to not see Anakin snap back.

Do we really have time for this?

                This movie started a bit slow with the politics, for about 45 minutes, but it did get into a good amount of Star Wars culture as well.  Natalie Portman was stuck with Anakin and her scenes suffered due to his performance.  Can’t she see that she is contributing to the downfall of the galaxy by letting Anakin seduce her in such an awkward way?  She doesn’t respect the true nature of the jedi’s ways so she’d better be willing to live with the consequences.  You see it’s not all Anakin’s fault after all, it’s always the woman.  The scenes of Anakin avenging his mother were a great insight to his moving toward the dark side.  I liked to see him lose it and kill all those sand people.  I hate sand as he once said in such an idiotic way. 

This is BS I shouldn't be killed off so easily.

                Obi-Wan is my favorite jedi and I liked him checking out the clone manufacturing plant.  The tall creatures that created the army were a fanciful kind of creepy.  That part of the movie provides the story with a perfect connection to blend right into the Obi-Wan and Jango Fett battle.  I’m a fan of action sequences that are one on one with excellent camera shots.  To see a jedi battle straight up against a bounty hunter is exciting!  Jango Fett is able to showcase all the classic bounty hunter gadgets that give him just enough edge to win the confrontation.  He was also very well played by Temuera Morrison.  It’s also neat to learn that Bobba Fett is actually just a clone of Jango.  He wanted to be his own father, how sweet.  Father knows best when you get to be the father, ha-ha!

                The coliseum battle toward the end was average at best.  I would have loved to see a couple of Rancor’s entering the fray.  How about Amidala and Anakin kissing on top of that beast?  Can we control our hormones for just one second?  We might get eaten at any moment!  The part when Bobba Fett saw his “dad” die was right in the heart.  Mace Windu (Samuel L. Jackson) got the satisfaction of an old fashion decapitation.  Collect your bounty from the nearest Hutt Master Windu!  But really you need that to be in the movie, it explains why Bobba followed the path of his “father”.  Or is it because he really is just the same man and would have become a bounty hunter anyway?  Don’t you love being filled with those thoughts now?

Weak my companions are.

                The Count Dooku battle scene at the end was one of the best in the Star Wars series, hands down, keep them down.  Christopher Lee rocked that battle, tell me I’m wrong!  He easily handles Obi-Wan and chops off Anakin’s forearm, nice!  Yoda comes in and has to save their sorry butts.  I loved seeing that little guy bounce all around the place but in the end his reluctance to save Obi-Wan and Anakin let Dooku escape.  Well he couldn’t let them die, Yoda is a nice guy.  The story really picks up well after the bland, less interesting beginning of the film and gets you excited for episode III.  I'll leave you with one final thought, how about Leonardo DiCaprio as Anakin Skywalker?

                Rating: 8 of 10


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